Release

I find peace in writing
I used to find peace in fighting
With myself and others
To pull my mind out of these gutters.
Whether pen to pad or fingers to keys
I have to find a way to fulfill my needs.

Life pushes and pulls and gets rough on the edges
But I must push back and resist its ledges
Before I fall completely
And the angels come seek me.

I'm blessed, secure, and healthy
But it wasn't always this pretty
There were times when things were gritty -
Witnessing finances lead to my parents' divorce
Getting bullied and questioning my life's course.

And as I got older my luck got colder -
Dodging a DUI, a near kidnapping and a nasty car crash,
Amongst other things.
My soul was getting diluted and ugly
And all I could think of was cash.
I cannot lie and say I don't want my words
To lead me to riches,
But what I truly want is for my writing
To help me find inner peace and
Release.