Thought of the Day

If you spend about 30 seconds thinking about the frivolity of just about every occupational field, you'll conclude the only occupations necessary for the survival of the human species are farmers, doctors, and carpenters. If we really wanted to continue traveling long distances, I suppose engineers and mechanics would be necessary. Let that sink in for a minute. Of the tens of thousands of job titles we presently have: jingle writer, wedding planner, risk management analyst, polo player, administrative assistant, district attorney, stock broker, senior web developer, hair stylist, soldier, Congressman, theoretical physicist, crossing guard, dry cleaner, accountant, sandwich artist, motivational speaker, advertising executive, mad scientist, retail associate, licensed seamless gutter contractor, teacher, personal trainer, regional sales manager, domestic goddess, professional gambler, school counselor, country music singer, rodeo clown, mixologist, etc., only five serve an objectively imperative purpose. Everything else is completely trivial and extraneous, a sheer waste of time, energy, and resources. But, you said teacher! That's ridiculous, how will people learn? Well, if we only need farmers, doctors, carpenters, engineers, and mechanics, then those who are currently one of those five things will apprentice replacements for the future. They serve a dual purpose of teaching the only things we need to know to live well and propagate our species. So the next time you report to the circus to perform your job as the high wire balancing associate, think about how you wouldn't have to be doing such an insane act for money in my pragmatist's paradise.